Gedicht :)

hey, ich hab ein Gedicht geschrieben und mich würde total interessieren, wie ihr es findet. Es ist auf Englisch, weil ich mich dabei wohler fühle :) bitte seid freundlich, ihr könnt sehr gerne Kritik schreiben, aber mir bedeutet diese Gedicht sehr viel und ich würde mich freuen, wenn ihr es auch wertschätzen könnt💓 ich kann mir gut vorstellen, dass man das Gedicht nicht richtig versteht, wenn man es so liest, aber es geht basically um den Mond (1) und die Sonne (2) vielleicht könnt ihr selber was reininterpretieren und versuchen, es für euch zu verstehen 💕 (btw die Formatierung passt leider nicht, die Zeilen sind eigentlich anders aufgeteilt):

(1)„The moon keeps secrets the sun cannot bear.That‘s why they blame me for all their despair. Deep into the night, the shadows arise,where darkness and coldness rule over the light.“

(2)„But under your eyes I discovered new shades of blue, you always look paler when the moon shines on you. And somehow the cruelty finds an easy way in, when the last golden glimpses fade from your skin. Yet I know it‘s the curse that the wind always whispers, when memories linger in forgotten corners.“

(1)„But behind my closed eyes- they are revived. I tried to hide in the sunlight, but it‘s too pure for my kind. It‘s woven within me with seams through my veins, so whenever I bleed, the lunar eclipse begins to reign.“

Englisch, Anglistik, englische Sprache, Gedicht, Literatur, Lyrik, Poesie
Ist das richtig gutes Englisch?

Oder merkt man sofort, dass eine Maschine das übersetzt hat? Ich kann zwar ein wenig Englisch, aber zu wenig, als dass ich den Originaltext aus dem Deutschen in richtig gutes Englisch übersetzen könnte. Die Übersetzung stammt also nicht von mir, sondern von einer KI. Merkt man das?

Completely relaxed, nine-year-old Karl lay in the grass under the ancient oak tree, gazing with a small smile at the magnificent green canopy above him. The sun was high in the brilliantly blue sky, and its warmth felt wonderful. Not a single cloud had been seen all morning on this day in July 1870.

Like all children, Karl also loved the long summer holidays. This was undoubtedly the most beautiful time of the year. He had played with his friends all morning, but now one after the other had gotten hungry and had gone home.

But Karl did not want to go home yet. Out here on the meadow in front of the small town of Rehna, it was so beautiful, and around noon was always the time when his father always locked the pharmacy for two hours and came home for lunch. He preferred to avoid an encounter with him. As far back as he could remember, he had feared his father. There was not a single day in his life when he had not been afraid of him.

Above him, in the branches of the oak, a bird sang its song, but the boy hardly noticed the singing. He had closed his eyes and was trying to remember as far back as he could. There were very early images in his head, the loving face of his mother, and a few vague memories that had no meaning. But finally, he found the first coherent memory of his life.

Englisch lernen, USA, Text, Übersetzung, englische Sprache, Grammatik, Rechtschreibung

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