Text bewerten (Englisch)?
Hallo, ich bin neu hier! Ich bin 14 Jahre alt, gehe auf ein österreichisches Gymnasium und hätte gerne ehrliche, konkrete Meinungen zu meinem Englisch-Text. Ich schreibe sehr gerne auf Englisch, habe aber in der Schule keine Möglichkeit, mein (eventuelles) Talent auszudrücken, da wir leider mehr auf Fachtexte gedrillt werden. Deshalb würde ich mich mega freuen, wenn jemand meinen Freestyle-Text (OHNE KI, OHNE ÜBERSETZER ODER GOOGLE, OHNE WÖRTERBUCH, KOMPLETT FREESTYLE) von 1-10 bewerten bzw mir ein bisschen Feedback geben könnte :D Keep in mind: Ich bin 14, weiblich & gehe auf ein Gymnasium, der Text ist Freestyle (evtl. wichtig bei der Bewertung mit einzubeziehen). Meine Muttersprache ist btw deutsch, ich wurde nicht multilingual aufgezogen. Der Text handelt von einer kurzen Beschreibung eines Mordes/den Konsequenzen. Brutale Szenen sind nicht detailliert beschrieben und ich habe natürlich nicht wirklich solch psychopathische Fantasien. Los geht's: The air around me weighs heavier than the guilt. The once colorful forest floor is now soaked in the liquid of the life I took. This is the first time I take control over something that doesn't belong to me. I lay my dagger in the cold hand of hers, now gone forever, then I sit down next to her. Fear strikes through my entire body as I kiss her one last time, one last goodbye. I've never seen something so vulnerable, her corpse seems like an empty shell of who she once was. She was scared. I'm almost sorry she didn't know how easy an escape would've been for her. She died in freedom, and that thought makes me frantic. Her skin looks even paler than usual, soft moonlight lightening her expression. I like to remember how this could've turned out if she showed obedience, but she didn't want to listen. She never listened. She has a will of her own. -Had- a will of her own. The forest starts to fill up with the shallow smell of blood, though for me, it smells like success. She forsake me, but in the end, I won. I walked over dead bodies, literally. Her voice will always haunt me, she wasn't meant to leave yet. Sometimes, I can still feel a weirdly realistic, lingering presence behind me. I see warped shadows from the corners of my eyes, when I feel the urge to k!// again, something stops me, as if she lays her hands on my neck whispering "Don't let my death be meaningless." I hate the way we switched rolls, I swear I wanted to protect her, but now she has to protect the others from me. Her spirit wants me to surrender, she won't leave me. I hear her shaking, brittle voice in the back of my mind everyday, telling me I did something horrible I cannot undo. Her will is clear, almost as strong and independent as it was when she was alive, she whispers ~"Either you bring me back or I'll take you with me."~ Sooo das wär's :D bitte Feedback + Bewertung 1-10, dankeee