Englisch?
Könnte jemand bitte über meinen Text drüber schauen? Danke!
,,I have been living in xy with my family, so my mother, my father, my sister, and two pets since 2015. On the one hand, I like living here since it is a quiet place but on the other hand, I don‘t like living here because of the people. Some of them are just mean. Above all, it‘s sometimes hard to get to school because I go to school by taking two buses. The first one arrives here at 6:40 a.m, so I need to leave the house at 6:28 a.m. That means I have to get up at 5:40 a.m. to brush my teeth and change clothes. The second one arrives in x at 6:55 a.m. If the first bus doesn‘t arrive punctually, I miss the other bus and that means I would have to wait in x until someone of my family would pick me up. That happened one day. I was very stressed. I had been waiting for about 30 minutes until my father picked me up. He arrived after 30 minutes because he had been at his job before, so it was a stressful day for everyone. I normally arrive at school at 7:15 a.m. and as soon as I arrive there, I either talk to Jana and Melinda or if we write a class test on that day, I repeat the stuff that I studied the day before. I always try to do my best. After school, I always have lunch with my family. I always talk a lot and tell my parents about everything. After eating, I always study for tests and class tests which we are going to write soon or I simply prepare something for school like today. At 5:30 p.m. I always have a bath and after bathing, I go on with studying until 9 or 10 p.m. I really want to have a job which I really like. I still don‘t know what I want to work as in future. Some people say that I would be a very good teacher, scientist, lawyer or a doctor. At the weekend, I occasionally sleep until 11 a.m and then I eat "breakfast“. When there‘s nothing to do, we go to z to go for a walk along the xy. We have been going for a walk there for four years yet it is still not boring! Apart from that, I just relax. As you can see, my life isn‘t very unique right now but I like it! Before I came to this school, I had been at school in y. I came here in the middle of 6th grade. I always had to stay here until 3:30 p.m. because I was in class b (Also Klasse 6b). I hated going to school there because of the students and teachers. Most of them were extremely mean. That‘s the reason why I came to this school in 2022. In the Corona lockdown, so when I was in fifth grade I didn‘t really care about school and I played Roblox, an online game. I made a lot of online friends, so I played with them every time when I was able to. At the beginning of 6th grade, I started caring about school and I only had to stay at school until 1 p.m. because I was allowed to leave school earlier because of the circumstances. I also talked a lot back then but I didn‘t really study because I was interested in playing Roblox. So, my life hasn‘t really changed except my school life but I think it will change in the coming years. Next year I will be in xth grade and I still can‘t believe it because time flies so fast and I think my daily routine will change completely since we will have to go to an internship every Thursday and we will have to stay longer at school on Tuesdays, so it is going to be very stressful.
2 Antworten
Hallo, ich habe mir mal die Mühe gemacht, deinen Text zu lesen und habe ein paar Stellen korrigiert bzw. verbessert. Diese Stellen habe ich durch Fettdruck markiert. An zwei Stellen konnte ich dem Text leider nicht ganz folgen; dort habe ich entsprechende Kommentare (in Kursivdruck) eingefügt:
I have been living in xy with my family, so my mother, my father, my sister, and two pets in XY since 2015. On the one hand, I like living here since it is a quiet place, but on the other hand, I don‘t like living here because of the people. Some of them are just mean. Above all, it‘s sometimes hard to get to school because I go to school by taking two buses because I have to go by bus and change buses on my way to school. The first one arrives here goes / runs at 6:40 a.m, so I need to leave the house at 6:28 a.m. That means I have to get up at 5:40 a.m. to brush my teeth and change clothes if I want to brush my teeth after breakfast and get dressed.
Ab dieser Stelle ist mir nicht ganz klar, wie ich mir deinen Schulweg vorstellen muss: The second one arrives in x at 6:55 a.m. If the first bus doesn‘t arrive punctually, I miss the other bus ...
Ich vermute, dass du Folgendes sagen wolltest: There is another bus at 6:55 a.m., but if this bus is late, I miss the bus I have to take when I change. Missing this bus means having to wait for someone to pick me up and take me to school.
and that means I would have to wait in x until someone of my family would pick me up. That happened one day. I was very stressed because I had been waiting to wait for about 30 minutes until my father picked me up. He arrived only after 30 minutes because he had been at his job before, so it was a stressful day for everyone.
I normally arrive at school at 7:15 a.m. and as soon as I get there, I either talk to Jana and Melinda or if we write a class test on that day, I repeat the stuff that I studied the day before. I always try to do my best. After school, I always have lunch with my family. I always talk a lot and tell my parents about everything. After eating, I usually study for tests and class tests (which we are going to write soon) or I simply prepare something other things for school like today. At 5:30 p.m. I always have a bath and after bathing, I go on with studying until 9 or 10 p.m.
After school, I really want to have a job which I really like, but I still don‘t know what I want to do in future job this could be. Some people say that I would be a very good teacher, scientist, lawyer or a doctor. At weekends, I occasionally sleep until 11 a.m and then I eat have a late breakfast.
When there‘s nothing to do, we [who?] go to Z to go for a walk along the xy. Although we have been going for a walk there for four years, yet it is still not boring! we haven’t been bored yet. Apart from that, I just relax. As you can see, my life isn‘t very unique exciting right now, but I like it! Before I came to this school, I had been/was at school in y.
Ab dieser Stelle wird es verwirrend – ich weiß nicht mehr genau, von wie vielen Schulen bzw. von welcher Schule du sprichst ... I came here (?) in the middle of 6th grade. I always had to stay here (?) until 3:30 p.m. because I was in class b (warum ist das ein Grund dafür, bis halb vier an der Schule zu sein?). I hated going to school there because of the students and teachers. Most of them were extremely mean. That‘s the reason why I came to this school in 2022. During the Corona lockdown, so when I was in the fifth grade, I didn‘t really care about school and I played Roblox, an online game. I made a lot of online friends, so I played with them every time when whenever I was able to. At the beginning of the 6th grade, I started caring about school and I only had to stay at school until 1 p.m. because I was allowed to leave school earlier because of the circumstances (Welche Umstände?) . I also talked a lot back then, but I didn‘t really study because I was only interested in playing Roblox. So, my life hasn‘t really changed except my school life, but I think it will change in the coming years. Next year, I will be in the xth grade and I still can‘t believe it because time flies so fast and I think my daily routine will change completely since because we will have to go to an internship every Thursday and we will have to stay longer at school on Tuesdays, so it is going to be very stressful.
Achte auf folgende Punkte:
- Verwende „since” mit der Bedeutung „da” am besten nur am Satzanfang, denn sonst neigt man dazu „since” in der Satzmitte eher als „seit” zu verstehen.
- Versuche deinem Text durch gezielt gesetzte Absätze eine klarere Struktur zu verleihen.
- Vermeide Wortwiederholungen im selben Satz.
Hoffe, das hilft dir weiter.
LG
On the one hand, I like living here since it is a quiet place but on the other....
Ich würde sagen es müsste heißen, on the one hand I like living here because it is a quiet place....
as heißt als.
Und since heißt seit, kann selten auch weil bedeuten.
Aber in deinem Zusammenhang ist because richtig.
As heißt weil wenn man es in as much as.....usw. benutzt
Ja, wie viele andere Wörter hat auch as verschiedene Bedeutungen, darunter auch weil (= because), siehe 3.: https://de.pons.com/%C3%BCbersetzung/deutsch-englisch/as?bidir=1
I always talk al lot and tell my parents about everything.....
Richtiger ist es: I always talk a lot and tell my parents anything.
Kann since und as nicht auch weil bedeuten?