Ist diese Charakterisierung gut (english)?
Also einmal im generellen, Sara wird gleich charakterisiert und sie ist die Freundin von Chip. Miles ist Chips Zimmergenosse.
So in der Szene die ich analysieren soll, ging es darum, dass Chip und Sara zusammen mit den Eltern von Sara in die Oper gehen wollen, allerdings gab es dann ein paar Streitigkeiten zwischen Sara und Chip.
Hier die Charakterisierung:
In the following I want to characterise Sarah, the girlfriend from Chip, who is one of the protagonists from the novel “Looking for Alaska” by John Green.
Sarahs Outward appearance is described as a girl with long blonde hair, which is pulled up into a twist with a strand of hair falling down each side of her face. Miles thinks, that she looks like a movie star, a bitchy one. (L. 27) Sara seems to be Very terrified, when she perceives that Chip can’t iron. This gets distinct with the observation “Can’t you at least press your shirt?” (L.25) The statement of Chip “we don’t all have maids to do our ironing”(L.30) Sara can be described as a rich and privileged girl, who doesn’t get confrontrated with chores at home. Moreover, Sara’s parents seem to be very descent, because they want to go “in the opera”(L.33) which is an sign of noble an elegant characteristics. In the following conservation between her an Chip the atmosphere seems to be very tense. She answers very annoyed and serious “Look, we’re going or we’re not going”(L.37) after Chip tried explain to her, that her parents hate him. Then Chip says, that “he doesn’t want to go with her anywhere”(L.38), Sara shows an an angry behaviour because she “slammed the door”(L.40) and said in an ironical way “Fine. Have a great night”(L.40) The relationship between them, can be interpreted intently and negative charged. After Sara leaves the room, Miles explaines to Chip, that he finds her “nice”(L.45) Shortly afterwards, the pay phone rings outside (L.48) an it was Sara, who wants to talk with Chip again. She may feels sorry or wants to resolve the conversation they had. But after an unknown conversation they had, Chip shouts “Screw you to”, which is an evidence, that the conversation didn’t turn out well.
All in all, the relationship between Sara an Chip is not good. Sara often gets angry and annoyed in the presence of Chip. They also don’t harmonier together.
Das Ergebnis basiert auf 7 Abstimmungen
2 Antworten
In the following I want to characterise Sarah, the girlfriend from (Präposition) Chip, who is one of the protagonists from the novel “Looking for Alaska” by John Green.
Sarahs (RS; Grammatik) Outward (RS) appearance is described as (Formulierung; nicht die äußere Erscheinung wird als ein Mädchen beschrieben) a girl with long blonde hair (---) pulled up into a twist with a strand of hair falling down each side of her face. Miles thinks (kein Komma) that she looks like a movie star, a bitchy one. (L. 27) Sara (RS) seems to be Very (RS) terrified (kein Komma) when she perceives that Chip can’t (Kurzformen in der Schriftsprache meiden.) iron. This gets distinct with the observation (Formulierung) “Can’t you at least press your shirt?” (L.25) The statement of Chip (s-genitive) “we don’t all have maids to do our ironing”(L.30) Sara (s.o.) can be described as a rich and privileged girl, who doesn’t (s.o.) get confrontrated (RS) with chores at home. Moreover, Sara (RS)’s parents seem to be very descent (Wort) (kein Komma) because they want to go “in the opera”(L.33) which is an (RS; Grammatik) sign of noble an (RS) elegant characteristics (Formulierung). In the following conservation (RS) between her an (RS) Chip (Komma) the atmosphere seems to be very tense. She answers very annoyed and serious (Grammatik) “Look, we’re going or we’re not going”(L.37) after Chip tried (Hier fehlt etwas.) explain to her (kein Komma) that her parents hate him. Then Chip says (kein Komma) that “he doesn’t want to go with her anywhere”(L.38), Sara (RS) shows (---) an angry behaviour (Formulierung) because she “slammed the door”(L.40) and said in an ironical way (Position) “Fine. Have a great night”(L.40) The relationship between them (kein Komma) can be interpreted intently (Formulierung) and negative (Grammatik) charged. After Sara (RS) leaves the room, Miles explaines (RS) to Chip (kein Komma) that he finds her “nice”(L.45) Shortly afterwards, the pay phone rings outside (L.48) an (RS) it was (Grammatik) Sara (RS) (kein Komma) who wants to talk with Chip again. She may (Wort) feels (Grammatik) sorry or wants to resolve the conversation they had. But after an unknown conversation they had (Satzstellung), Chip shouts “Screw you to (RS)”, which is an evidence (kein Komma) that (Formulierung) the conversation didn’t turn out well.
All in all, the relationship between Sara (RS) an (RS) Chip is not good. Sara often gets angry and annoyed in the presence of Chip (s-genitive). They also don’t harmonier (RS) together (Wort).
Es gibt keine "1 zu 1" Übersetzungen; viele Formulierungen sind Denglish oder, wie meine englischen Freunde so gerne sagen, Deutshlish.
Das Fettgedruckte muss korrigiert werden. Ich hoffe, ich habe nichts übersehen.
Für das Vokabular und die Rechtschreibung empfehle ich ein gutes (online) Wörterbuch, z.B. pons.com,
für die Grammatik ego4u.de und englisch-hilfen.de - und Finger weg vom Google Übelsetzer und seinen tr.tteligen Kollegen!
:-) AstridDerPu
Wow, vielen lieben Dank. Da haben sie sich aber eine Menge Mühe gemacht. Echt top!
Also hier und da ist das noch ein bisschen holprig, grammatikalisch und von der Wortwahl her. Darüber hinaus ist es teilweise sehr nah am Text gehalten und die Zitate wirken in ihrer Zahl und Häufigkeit teils zwanghaft eingebaut. Mit einem etwas längeren Text könnte man dies sicherlich umgehen; alternativ durch mehr indirekte Zitate.
Ich kenne eure Vorgaben und die Klassenstufe nicht, weswegen eine Gesamteinordnung natürlich sehr schwierig ist. Ich denke im Vergleich mit deinen Klassenkameraden wirst du dich im Mittelfeld befinden. Wäre ich die Messlatte hätte ich allerdings "schlecht" wählen müssen.
Ich hoffe, ich konnte dir helfen. Beste Grüße
Hans Dieter